Stories 

Zilchville

by 

Gene Fredericks

​

​Zilchville does not exist, or so they say. According to them, what is the point, so why

exist?

They are, however, very opinionated and expressive with their hands, which have four

middle fingers and two opposing thumbs.

Their fingers express their inner feeling and their opposing thumbs are used to make sure

their opinions are known, which are always opposing and thumbs down. Occasionally when

they need to travel away from Zilchville, which they rarely do, because every other place

is worse than where they are; they use their opposing thumbs to hitchhike. When they

are picked up in one of the few vehicles still running in Zilchville, they thumb their nose

at the driver, which is their way of greeting, and then give them one of their other

finger to show the disrespect and contempt they have for the one who is navigating

the from-here-to-there traveling machine.

Along the way from here to wherever they don’t say much mostly how terrible things

are and how the weather couldn’t be worse, but probably will be.

The navigator usually gives them the finger, it doesn’t really matter which one since

they all mean about the same. The traveling machines don’t travel fast or far. They are

electric vehicles that use static electricity. The passengers have to rub their head

together with balloons and since static electricity is an imbalance of positive and

negative charges within a material they move because of there is a considerable

amount of imbalance since they express this opinions frequently there is always static

in the air.

Ironically, that static in the air is so abundant that they sell off the excess. It is the main

source of fuel for their negative economy to run on; well, it has more walks than runs. They

package up and export negative vibes all over the places that do exist, which, if you

think about it, is everywhere else!

To say the Zilchoids are content would not be true, but it wouldn’t be a lie. They are in

a state of imbalance, as we have learned, and therefore are status quo. Things could be

better, but they could be worse. Who cares what the Zilchoids think and then stop thinking

because what is the point?

They make Zilchoidette by placing their thumbs in their partner's mouth and another

place, and once the connection is made, so is a baby. The new charged packet of

energy is not an immaculate conception, but it is not a mess either. Love is not an

emotion that is expressed since they don’t have a digit for it. But there is a cessation

of discontentment while they raise their young. Each Zilchoid unit must raise one

Zilchoid unit to keep the Zilchville from becoming just Zilch.

This has gone on for eons. All of the negative vibes in the universe come from

Zilchville, and we all know how many negative vibes there are in the places that do exist.

And so it goes.